Being the best version of yourself means you get up, dress up, show up and get going into your day.

Plans for your future depend on your vision of who you want to be, what goals you set for yourself and what it will take to get you there.  Action. 

So, what is really holding us back? Can we cope with what others think about what we want to achieve? 

Sometimes it can feel like everyone else is achieving their goals in life and yet you keep struggling to figure out how they do it. When is it your turn to have that life? You just don’t seem to make the leap from where you are now to where you want to be.

If you are nodding your head now, you are not alone. Identify whether it is fear, limiting beliefs or your unconscious mind that is creating the problem. You are the only one that has the power to make the shift and move forward or continue to hold yourself back.

Are you always making excuses?

When we are making excuses, we are often driven by fear, insecurity or simply complacency that is holding you back.

Our limiting beliefs can also hinder any progress in life. They can be influenced by an event or circumstance in your past that made you feel powerless or inadequate. And those beliefs can also exist on an unconscious level and drive your every thought, word or action. Can you imagine that the thoughts and beliefs that are embedded deep in your unconscious mind determines how you think and behave every day?

Sometimes it is easy to spot a pattern of negative behaviour and beliefs because it shows up in your conversations or thoughts. Other times it is hiding in a layer of truth in an excuse.

Now, think of something you want and think about why you don’t have it. Are there a few things? Have you just revealed to yourself any negative emotions and limiting beliefs that end up being some form of resistance and excuses?

Become aware of a negative voice that tells you that you can’t do it, you are not good enough or you would never be able to have that. Often this is a learned behaviour from your childhood that is now embedded in your subconscious and holding you back.

How do you overcome those self-limiting beliefs?

Write down those beliefs and acknowledge them. Can you recognize the perceived limitations in your life? There could be some tendency to assign a negative meaning with some trepidation or an inability to take a risk.  Now challenge yourself with a new and empowering meaning to the experience or situation. Change the ‘cause and effect’ in your decision making from the negative to the positive. All those once perceived obstacles that stopped you from achieving anything and reaching goals in life will now help you make the big leap, learn new things and ultimately experience a level of pride from successfully getting through.

Never sacrifice who you are, or who you aspire to be because someone else has a problem with it.

What will others think of me if I change?

When we worry about what others think of us, we restrict our growth in life and drain ourselves of positivity. Any negative comments someone makes is really about themselves, they are identifying problems within themselves and projecting them onto you.

Projection is a typical tool used by someone who has a vested interest in keeping you in the same place in their life. Projection shows up when someone accuses you of being selfish and self-centred.  In fact, your accuser is selfish, they don’t like that about themselves, dump it on others and accuse them of having it.

So be true to yourself and embrace the change – you only have one life! Remove the source of any negative comments, trust a few and then forget the rest.

If people don’t like the new version of you and the person you have become, they are stripping the self-respect out of you.  They are simply envious and really want that change for themselves.

Don’t live your life for others.  Allow and give yourself permission to live the life you want for YOU.

It’s natural to be concerned about what others may think of you but by worrying about them will make you feel overwhelmed and anxious. Stop being hard on yourself.

Retrain your mind to focus on what’s most important in the now moment rather than on what others are saying or thinking. Learn to use constructive criticism in a healthy way to allow yourself to grow without damaging your self-confidence.  

Replace those negative thoughts with realistic and positive ones.

Probably not everyone is going to like you but that’s OK. You can’t please everyone. You can learn to accept your own weaknesses so you can improve on them for yourself. We all have weaknesses or flaws, but only the strong have the courage to admit it.

When you identify those in yourself see an opportunity to better yourself.  Then you can reset yourself on a path of positive change. Rather than dwelling on all that may be perceived to be wrong or faults with yourself, focus on a goal that you could achieve and stop worrying about others.

There will always be someone who won’t understand what you’re trying to say or do.

Always someone will misinterpret you. You have no control over them. It only matters as much as you allow it to. Stay true to your core values and be happy that what you’re doing feels right for you.  The better you feel about yourself, the less you feel the need for approval from others.

It may be difficult to go and chase what you want because you’re so used to worrying about what other people think about you ………… that’s OK.

It’s fine to feel stuck or confused  – just don’t stay there.

When life is calling you from your heart space, then you must move towards it with as much passion and enthusiasm as you have. This will be the basis of achieving a fulfilled life.